Originals

Paul Manafort’s To Do List

Set the DVR to record the next 7 to 10 years of The Bachelor.


Arrange for Trump campaign volunteers to water my plants.


Have all of my teeth removed and replaced with razor-sharp, pointy steel teeth


Do a bit of sprucing up before the photo session for People magazine’s “Biggest Piece Of Shit, Human Garbage” issue.


Hide myself better than I hid my money.


Intentionally contract anal warts, as to be less appealing in the big house.


Try to somehow work a merchandising angle for all of the eventual Manafort effigies.


Hey, I just remembered!   I don’t need to do anything!   Trump will probably pardon me!


Written by Kit Lively

Kit Lively

Ain’t It Cool News said of Kit, “If Gary Larson is Bill Cosby, then Kit is Richard Pryor.” That’s a great quote, right? Man, I love that quote! That was, until Bill Cosby turned out to be a deplorable serial rapist. Now the quote isn’t worth shit, even though my name isn’t linked directly to Cosby’s! Thanks a lot Bill, you jackass. Not only have you ruined dozens of lives with your rapey ways, but you’ve ruined a perfectly good quote as well. I hope you rot in Hell, you scumbag.
Anyway, Kit’s cartoons have been published by lots of humor magazines, etc. etc. yadda yadda. (sigh)….

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