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Other Inspirational Messages To Female Artists From The Grammy’s President

“Step up to the microphone and start singing into it. The microphone will capture your lady sounds  so that they may be heard and manipulated by the engineers and then made presentable for male ears.”


“Some female artists often can’t be heard unless they’re seen. Step up…to a pair of 5-inch heels so your voice can be noticed.”


“Smile more. Sure your music is serious and powerful and could be an inspiration to millions around the world but, step up, be a good girl, and give us smile.”


“There are a lot of women out there writing amazing music. You know who you are. We don’t though. Maybe it’s a PR-thing. Just chill out and give us some space.”


“Don’t let anyone ever tell you ‘no’ when you want to play them your demo. Instead try to work out a compromise that involves no actual compromise on the part of the gatekeeper and wait for the right moment — which could be anytime. Just not right now, but soon. We’ll call you. Sometimes stepping up means waiting. For a long, long time.”


“Adele turned a failed relationship into mega-millions. Maybe you just need to step up and have your heart broken by a guy. Then, when you come back, people will be able to pay attention to your music — secure that you’re an artist that’s easily contained within a gender role that doesn’t cause them any additional stress.”


“Stop hiding behind that piano. Come on out and let’s get a good look at you.”


“One way to step up that’s not discussed often enough is by teaming up with a man who can write songs for you. Ike Turner helped Tina Turner become a celebrated artist. So, step up, find yourself an Ike.”


“Whatever happened with Lilith Fair? Not related to anything but, since you’re a female artist that was probably really important to you.”


“Everyone likes a giggler. So step up during a radio interview. They are a great place to reveal your saucy side and let the listeners’ imaginations run wild while you drop a few mischievous hints about your celebrity crushes.”


“Step up and make sure your next video includes a scene where you attach something like sparklers to a well-stuffed bikini top while you saunter around a video set inspired by the board game Candyland. I’m not sure what it means musically but I’m pretty sure it’ll get people talking.”


“I can’t believe I didn’t just say this first: step up and be more like Bruno Mars.”


Written by Chaco

Chaco

Chaco is a writer from the Bay Area. He is very tall and wishes that he could still dunk a basketball.

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