originals

16 Quotes That Show Donald Trump Could Be Your Drunk Uncle

Proof that if you add ‘Am I right, Sonny Boy?‘ to a Donald Trump quote, you get everyone’s drunk Uncle at a family gathering.


Wouldn’t you love to see one of these NFL owners, when somebody disrespects our flag, to say, ‘Get that son of a bitch off the field right now. Out. He’s fired. He’s fired.’ Am I right, Sonny Boy?


Black guys counting my money! I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are short guys that wear yarmulkes every day. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


I don’t repeat myself. I don’t repeat myself. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


If Hillary Clinton can’t satisfy her husband, what makes her think she can satisfy America? Am I right, Sonny Boy?


The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


Robert Pattinson should not take back Kristen Stewart. She cheated on him like a dog & will again.  – just watch. He can do much better!  Am I right, Sonny Boy?


It’s freezing and snowing in New York – we need global warming! Am I right, Sonny Boy?


My IQ is one of the highest — and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure; it’s not your fault. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media write as long as you’ve got a young, and beautiful, piece of ass. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


Why can’t we use nuclear weapons? Am I right, Sonny Boy?


I know more about ISIS than the generals do. Believe me. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


I think apologizing’s a great thing, but you have to be wrong. I will absolutely apologize, sometime in the hopefully distant future, if I’m ever wrong. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


He’s not a war hero. He’s a war hero because he was captured. I like people who weren’t captured. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending the best. They’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems. They’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime. They’re rapists and some, I assume, are good people. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


I have a great relationship with THE blacks. I’ve always had a great relationship with THE blacks. Am I right, Sonny Boy?


 

Written by Paul Lander

Paul Lander

Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of — winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending, Congolese gynecologist, Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney’s, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog, Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that’s been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul’s time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar…

Comments

comments